So, playing guitar hit harder when I was younger…
It was and still is a tool that helps me survive the effects of years of ongoing trauma I experienced. As a teenager I was very isolated and wasn’t allowed to have close friends or go to school. I was kept home from school and told to teach myself whatever I wanted to learn instead of learning from a curriculum or having an adult guide. I was made to believe this was normal and that I was even better off than the kids in the school system because they were being brainwashed and I was learning independence. This all left me feeling lonely, confused, and always questioning whether I was good enough or not. I had no tests, measuring sticks, or even an F that said I was right or wrong. I was also suffering emotional abuse which fueled those feelings of inadequacies and the silencing of my own voice. I chose to teach myself the guitar and practiced 2 to 5 hours a day and up. I even bought a college level theory book for guitar so I could know that I was at least smart in one subject since math, reading, and other subjects were left untouched. I’ve learned to thrive despite my early adversities and even used them to my advantage. For me, the guitar was my escape from those dark years of isolation and abuse. It still means so much to me today and has continued to give me a voice that for so many years was silent. So whether it’s guitar, art, or another passion you have, use your voice to express who you are. Please don’t go silent like I did for so many years. Much love fam.